Friday, July 29, 2011
.... of saying " NO "
Yours Sincerely ( Y S ) was not brought up to say "NO" to any requests asked of him. There had been requests which Y S sincerely could not fulfill but yet Y S agreed and then coughed and puffed trying to fulfill them. These misadventures had caused lots of stress and unnecessary tension in his life. Even when Y S was working often he stood up for his colleagues and went to the extremes to make colleagues happy.
As a fellow sojourner in the local church, Y S had ( Note the past tense used ) never said "NO" to any request made by the priests to the point of willing to sail into troubled waters where angels feared to tread in the Diocesan Pastoral Team ( The Bishop's Think Tank ) of the Penang Diocese. Y S survived " some beatings and tongue lashings " from the priests who feel that they are above reproaches and are very unteachable.
In the days of old ( just two months ago) Y S would say "yes" and then only think of ways and means to do it. When It was beyond his capacity, Y S even went to the extent to recruit others who had the knowledge and talent and worked together with them. NOT ANY MORE. The first "NO" Y S said was about two months ago.
The Parish Priest phoned Y S to represent the Catholics of Kedah to sit in the MCCBHT ( I hope I get it right. It is the Malaysian joint body of Buddhist, Christians, Catholics, Hindu, Taoist, Bahais etc etc etc and what have you) . You don't make someone a sacrificial lamb and land such a big duty on him by just phoning and without any guidelines and references.
Y S sniffed shirking of official duty. The body as all Malaysians know is represented by " high and higher" priests of sorts and Christians leaders with titles of "Rev so and so," Father so and so ," and "Swami what and what." It is like asking Y S to talk theology with the Dalai Lama, Pope, Billy Graham, Swami .. something ...something. Y S braved out the word " NO " and felt so nice about it. From that day the Parish Priest does not greed him in church anymore. This is the way of life even in churchy circle. You are a good sheep if you follow order but a bad one if you don't. But it is nice to be a bad one if you are right.
The moral of the story : learn to say "NO" if you really cannot assume the request. Y S is still feeling good about the first " NO " he uttered.
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2 comments:
Ah! Birds of the same feather we were.... but I learned to say no earlier... 8)
It's always hard to say 'No'... esp in the Asian culture, as we do not wish to 'offend' the other party. But I guess, sometimes you just have to be cruel to be kind.
I wish I stuck to my guns and said NO to a lot of things in my past! Oh well!
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